Mommy, I'm Stressed!
As parents, we've all experienced it. Some new situation
happens, and our little guys seem to lose their minds. Whining, over-reacting,
and generally making you and your spouse wonder why on earth you ever agreed to
have children are common. The point to remember is that stress is actually a
reaction to being overwhelmed. One must also remember that children aren't
always equipped to cope with stress the same way that the adults in their lives
are. Here are the biggest stressors for kids, and the more you know, the better
you can help them cope.
1. Change
One of the largest sources of stress for a child is change. This can be anything from a move to the death of a loved one. One of the first instances of stress that a child can experience is separation anxiety. One needs to remember that a child's primary caregiver leaving them with a sitter or at daycare or preschool is tantamount to abandonment to many kids. Children can display separation anxiety as young as infancy, and this anxiety can periodically reappear until a child is secure in their own social circles. Some children will react to separation after a parent mentions "I hope that they don't "freak out" when I leave" to try and garner attention from an anxious parent.
One of the largest sources of stress for a child is change. This can be anything from a move to the death of a loved one. One of the first instances of stress that a child can experience is separation anxiety. One needs to remember that a child's primary caregiver leaving them with a sitter or at daycare or preschool is tantamount to abandonment to many kids. Children can display separation anxiety as young as infancy, and this anxiety can periodically reappear until a child is secure in their own social circles. Some children will react to separation after a parent mentions "I hope that they don't "freak out" when I leave" to try and garner attention from an anxious parent.
2. Exclusion
Children that are considered "weird" by their peers will usually experience stress. Most human beings have an overwhelming need to fit in and be well liked, particularly during their formative years. When overtures of friendship are ignored or rejected, a child will blame him or herself, creating a vicious cycle that can follow them into adulthood. Those children that are kept "too busy to get into trouble" may also experience stress. A child, much like an adult, needs "down time" to do what they choose and discover hobbies that delight them so that as they become adults, they have healthy interests.
3. Jealousy
Children that are considered "weird" by their peers will usually experience stress. Most human beings have an overwhelming need to fit in and be well liked, particularly during their formative years. When overtures of friendship are ignored or rejected, a child will blame him or herself, creating a vicious cycle that can follow them into adulthood. Those children that are kept "too busy to get into trouble" may also experience stress. A child, much like an adult, needs "down time" to do what they choose and discover hobbies that delight them so that as they become adults, they have healthy interests.
3. Jealousy
With so many children receiving special needs labels, parents
and caregivers also need to be aware of sibling and familial relationships
causing feelings of stress in children. Special needs children take a great
deal of a parent's attention and patience. Often, there is nothing left for the
typical child to feel special about. Siblings and younger relatives can
experience feelings of jealousy that evolve into stress once the negative
feelings are addressed by caregivers.
4. Illness
Some of the most stressful situations for any child include personal illness, the illness of loved ones, or the death of a loved one. Children, as a rule, do not understand illness and death. A child understands that he does not feel good, that their loved one does not feel good, or the person that they love is gone and they are not coming back. What they do not always understand is why. Once again, in this situation, a child's routine is disturbed, causing undue stress.
It is a parent or caregiver's priority to ensure that a child learns to cope with their feelings of stress. The best way to teach coping skills is, as with anything else, communication, love and support. Treat your kid like an adult, and let them know you’ll be there for them!
Some of the most stressful situations for any child include personal illness, the illness of loved ones, or the death of a loved one. Children, as a rule, do not understand illness and death. A child understands that he does not feel good, that their loved one does not feel good, or the person that they love is gone and they are not coming back. What they do not always understand is why. Once again, in this situation, a child's routine is disturbed, causing undue stress.
It is a parent or caregiver's priority to ensure that a child learns to cope with their feelings of stress. The best way to teach coping skills is, as with anything else, communication, love and support. Treat your kid like an adult, and let them know you’ll be there for them!
Tom Kelly writes about
parenting, saving money and frequenting www.creditscore.net.
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