I don't currently have a child diagnosed with ADHD - and I don't have any sons - but as an educator, I do frequently run into students with ADHD, and one of my close friends has a son with ADHD, and so do several relatives, so I have seen the struggles that come about when parenting a child with ADHD. That's why I was interested in reading and reviewing a book about specifically raising boys with ADHD - especially one that talks about raising happy sons. I found the book very helpful in understanding the struggles of a child with ADHD, and I also found it very comprehensive, ranging from early diagnosis to transitioning to work and higher education. The tone is very real, written by people who have been there, not just people who happen to have studied ADHD.
1) How can parents recognize ADHD in boys as compared to just normal activity? In general boys are more active than girls so moms that have not grown up with brothers often find it challenging to figure out their active boy. He likes to build things and then smash them to pieces. He climbs and jumps and makes all types of strange noises. When playing outside the young boy finds the dirtier and grimier the activity, the better. These behaviors are along the lines of typical boy energy and behavior. If a mom is concerned her son’s excessive activity may be related to ADHD she can consider three important points.
1. Over how long a period of time have the behaviors been occurring?
2. How frequent does the boy’s behavior occur?
3. How intense are the boy’s behaviors?
See, in order to recognize behavior that is not ‘normal activity,’ the behavior will occur on a regular and consistent basis over a long period of time. To psychologists, a long period of time is considered as least six months or more. Next, the behavior is not typical if it’s very frequent and occurs during school, at home, and throughout the boy’s daily activities. Finally, the behavior is not typical if it’s usually a very intense episode of behavior. This is the type of intensity that makes you think, “Wow, is this seems like unreal behavior for his age.” If your boy’s behavior has occurred for more than six months, occurs frequently across all settings, and is extremely intense, consult with a medical or mental health professional because it could be ADHD.
2) What are some solutions available to help children with ADHD be successful?First, it’s very important to have an accurate diagnosis by a licensed professional. An accurate diagnosis can help guide parents toward choosing the best solutions. We recommend parents obtain a full medical or psychoeducational evaluation. Once you have an accurate diagnosis then you can begin to prioritize what will work best for you and your child. The following are solutions that many parents consider:
· medication,
· individual and/or family counseling,
· using a behavioral system,
· vitamins and supplements,
· Cogmed working memory training,
· Neurofeedback,
· Creating structure and routines,
· and being consistent.
Another solution is Dr. Forgan’s parent friendly video support system to help parents of ADHD boys ages 5-17. Parents can receive a licensed school psychologist’s professional advice within the comfort of their own home. Just connect to the internet, watch, learn, and apply techniques to help create a more peaceful home with less conflict. This support system is organized into 10 easy to use modules so you can learn the best ways to help your son reduce his negativity, increase his motivation, and take more responsibility. This is offered at a one-time cost that is less than a nice pair of shoes. To learn more go to www.JimForgan.com.
3) What do parents who don't have kids with ADHD need to know about ADHD?First, parents of boys with ADHD appreciate not being judged by parents of children without ADHD. One thing I’d tell parents of kids without ADHD is, “Thanks for not judging me and my boy. Often I am as frustrated and shocked at my boy’s behavior as you are and I’m trying to raise him to be a polite, respectful, and well-mannered boy.” See, until you’ve actually raised a boy with ADHD you don’t truly understand that his ongoing challenges drain us mentally and physically.In addition, his ADHD strain every relationship in our family as well as with others.
Another topic we discuss in our book is that parents of kids with ADHD have to have ‘thick skin’ because their boy with ADHD can make it appear that the parent simply has few or no parenting skills. The ADHD boy’s behavior can make it look like he’s in charge instead of the parent. What parents of boys with ADHD don’t understand it that the mom is parenting her boy but is probably ‘picking her battles.’ At the same time she is trying not to embarrass herself and her boy in front of everyone.
4) What makes this book different from other books about ADHD in kids?This book is different because it’s written by two practicing professionals that are also parents of boys with ADHD so they ‘get it’ and relate their expertise and experiences in a practical way to help others. One key feature is that our book contains the Dynamic Action Plan that every parent of a boy with ADHD should complete. If you don’t have a written plan for your son then you’ll want to pick up a copy of the book and complete this to use as a guide for your boy. In sum, if parents want authentic ADHD help from a book then look no further.
I had a chance to interview
Jim Forgan, Ph.D. and Mrs. Mary Anne
Richey, M. Ed., licensed School Psychologists and
authors of the book, Raising Boys with ADHD: Secrets for Parenting Healthy, Happy Sons. They
can be reached via the Facebook Page ‘Raising Boys with ADHD.’
1) How can parents recognize ADHD in boys as compared to just normal activity? In general boys are more active than girls so moms that have not grown up with brothers often find it challenging to figure out their active boy. He likes to build things and then smash them to pieces. He climbs and jumps and makes all types of strange noises. When playing outside the young boy finds the dirtier and grimier the activity, the better. These behaviors are along the lines of typical boy energy and behavior. If a mom is concerned her son’s excessive activity may be related to ADHD she can consider three important points.
1. Over how long a period of time have the behaviors been occurring?
2. How frequent does the boy’s behavior occur?
3. How intense are the boy’s behaviors?
See, in order to recognize behavior that is not ‘normal activity,’ the behavior will occur on a regular and consistent basis over a long period of time. To psychologists, a long period of time is considered as least six months or more. Next, the behavior is not typical if it’s very frequent and occurs during school, at home, and throughout the boy’s daily activities. Finally, the behavior is not typical if it’s usually a very intense episode of behavior. This is the type of intensity that makes you think, “Wow, is this seems like unreal behavior for his age.” If your boy’s behavior has occurred for more than six months, occurs frequently across all settings, and is extremely intense, consult with a medical or mental health professional because it could be ADHD.
2) What are some solutions available to help children with ADHD be successful?First, it’s very important to have an accurate diagnosis by a licensed professional. An accurate diagnosis can help guide parents toward choosing the best solutions. We recommend parents obtain a full medical or psychoeducational evaluation. Once you have an accurate diagnosis then you can begin to prioritize what will work best for you and your child. The following are solutions that many parents consider:
· medication,
· individual and/or family counseling,
· using a behavioral system,
· vitamins and supplements,
· Cogmed working memory training,
· Neurofeedback,
· Creating structure and routines,
· and being consistent.
Another solution is Dr. Forgan’s parent friendly video support system to help parents of ADHD boys ages 5-17. Parents can receive a licensed school psychologist’s professional advice within the comfort of their own home. Just connect to the internet, watch, learn, and apply techniques to help create a more peaceful home with less conflict. This support system is organized into 10 easy to use modules so you can learn the best ways to help your son reduce his negativity, increase his motivation, and take more responsibility. This is offered at a one-time cost that is less than a nice pair of shoes. To learn more go to www.JimForgan.com.
3) What do parents who don't have kids with ADHD need to know about ADHD?First, parents of boys with ADHD appreciate not being judged by parents of children without ADHD. One thing I’d tell parents of kids without ADHD is, “Thanks for not judging me and my boy. Often I am as frustrated and shocked at my boy’s behavior as you are and I’m trying to raise him to be a polite, respectful, and well-mannered boy.” See, until you’ve actually raised a boy with ADHD you don’t truly understand that his ongoing challenges drain us mentally and physically.In addition, his ADHD strain every relationship in our family as well as with others.
Another topic we discuss in our book is that parents of kids with ADHD have to have ‘thick skin’ because their boy with ADHD can make it appear that the parent simply has few or no parenting skills. The ADHD boy’s behavior can make it look like he’s in charge instead of the parent. What parents of boys with ADHD don’t understand it that the mom is parenting her boy but is probably ‘picking her battles.’ At the same time she is trying not to embarrass herself and her boy in front of everyone.
4) What makes this book different from other books about ADHD in kids?This book is different because it’s written by two practicing professionals that are also parents of boys with ADHD so they ‘get it’ and relate their expertise and experiences in a practical way to help others. One key feature is that our book contains the Dynamic Action Plan that every parent of a boy with ADHD should complete. If you don’t have a written plan for your son then you’ll want to pick up a copy of the book and complete this to use as a guide for your boy. In sum, if parents want authentic ADHD help from a book then look no further.
Disclosure: I received a complimentary copy of Raising Boys with ADHD to facilitate this review.
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