Does
the thought of hanging Christmas lights and attending holiday work parties make
you want to grab your sleeping bag and run for the nearest cave? 2013 has been
intense for many of us. We felt overscheduled, overworked and we rarely
got the chance to unplug. We navigated big career and life
transitions—and had little time to integrate these changes. Frankly,
we’re exhausted. We’re ready for rest. Not a relaxed evening by the fire, but a
serious stretch of lazy days, long naps, walks in the woods, deep nourishing
slumber and joyful, easy, simple connections with friends and family who feed
us emotionally and spiritually. What we most need in the coming weeks is
not the latest iPad or one last trip to the mall, but permission to rest,
relax, unplug and do nothing.
But
with the holidays and all the activity and invitations that come with this
season knocking on our door—what’s a person to do? I challenge you to
take the road less traveled and take a radical stand for what you most need
this year. Consider the following five ideas:
•
Schedule downtime now. Block out periods on your calendar during the
holiday season for “dedicated relaxation,” where your only job is to rest.
Schedule half-days, full days, weekends or an entire week if you can swing it.
Maybe you’ll feel like a nature hike when your period for renewal rolls around
or maybe you’re better served by staying in your pajamas, turning off your
smart phone, sipping on hot tea and watching the leaves fall from the trees.
Make down time a priority and schedule this now so you can honor your
commitment to deep to-the-bones self-renewal.
•
Just say no. Decide what’s most important to you and let
everything else go. If it’s not an “absolute yes,” then it’s a no. Don’t
want to miss Aunt Tracy’s special Christmas Eve dinner but feel exhausted at
the thought of attending your neighbor’s cookie exchange? Just say no and
let it go. You’ll be glad you did. The opportunity will come back around next
year. Our quality of life is always enhanced when we let go of things-not when
we add them. Check out my popular 9 Ways to Say No list from my
award-winning book, The Mother’s Guide to Self-Renewal: How to Reclaim,
Rejuvenate and Re-Balance Your Life.
•
Ask for help. Give yourself permission to ask for and
receive help whether it’s cooking, gift giving, socializing or hosting family.
Do it different. Be willing to let go of tradition for the sake of enhanced
emotional well-being. Step out of your comfort zone, reach out to friends,
neighbors and coworkers and ask for their help during the holidays so you can
create more space for yourself and your family to just “be.” What are three
things on your plate right now that you could delegate, outsource or ask for
help around?
•
Do less to experience more. Positive psychology researchers say we’re
happiest when we keep things simple and have fewer choices. We create
stress when we try and cram too much into our schedules and then try to control
everything we’re juggling. My friend author Joan
Borysenko says, “Your to-list is immortal; it will live on
long after you’re dead.” How can you simplify your plans (do you really need to
go chop down your own Christmas tree, make your mom’s famous stained glass
cookies and host your husband’s department dinner)? Popcorn, hot cider
and an evening of great conversation is hard to beat. Do less, so you can
experience more.
•
Unplug and spend time in
nature. My friend Richard
Louv author of the Nature Principle says,
“Time spent in nature is the most cost-effective and powerful way to counteract
the burnout and sort of depression that we feel when we sit in front of a
computer all day.” I call nature the ultimate antidepressant and re-set button.
If anyone in my family is exhausted or out of sorts, off to the greenbelt we
go. In fact, this holiday we’re completely unplugging and heading to the Davis
Mountains in West Texas for a week to enjoy some of the darkest night skies in
the U.S. Being in nature offers us nourishment and renewal on all
levels-physical, emotional, spiritual and mental. It is a powerful, restorative
and healing force. Use it!
There
is an innate push and pull that many of us feel during the winter season.
As the winter solstice approaches–the longest night of the year–our natural
rhythms are calling us to slow down, reflect, go inward and contemplate where
we’ve been and where we want to go. (Think of our friends the bears, they’ve
got it right!) Counter this with the world around us that is swirling
madly with activity and constantly telling us to do, eat, buy and be
more. It can feel quite confusing—and exhausting! And totally unsustainable.
I
challenge you: do it differently this season. Pause and enter the
holiday season mindfully and with a clear intention. If the call to making rest
and renewal a priority resonates with you this holiday, make this #1 for
yourself and for your family. Then, you can bound—instead of crawl–into 2014
fully present, refreshed and ready for the New Year.
- Renée Peterson Trudeau
Subscribe here to Live
Inside Out, a
weekly blog written by life balance coach/speaker, author Renée Peterson
Trudeau. Her work has appeared in The New York Times, Good Housekeeping and
more. Thousands of women in ten countries are becoming RTA-Certified
Facilitators and leading/joining self-renewal groups based on her
award-winning The Mother’s Guide to Self-Renewal. Her newest
release is Nurturing the Soul of Your Family: 10 Ways to Reconnect and
Find Peace in Everyday Life. She lives in Austin, Texas, with her
husband and 11 year-old son. Join Renee this January for her new 2014 life
balance telecourse New Way of Being: Learning to Go with the Flow.
www.ReneeTrudeau.com
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