No matter how many books you read or how many people you talk to, nothing can prepare you for parenthood. What’s more? It’s extremely easy to relinquish the things you enjoy the most to just try and “make it through the day”. The problem is we quickly fall into a rut that is hard to snap out of. There is a light at the end of the tunnel! If you are ready for a refresh in your life, take a look at these tips that let you get back to things you enjoy without sacrificing your family.
Start Small
Not only will you never have the life you used to live back, but you also won’t get to a place that is a satisfactory “new norm” overnight. Don’t set your sights too high, only to be let down within the first week. Start small and create realistic goals that can be accomplished each week or month.
Get the Whole Family Involved
A key factor that causes parents to get stuck is trying to carry the world on their shoulders. Keep in mind that you have an entire family unit that is available to help you. If your children are old enough, get them involved in the household chores and include them in some of the activities you are interested in that they could participate in. Don’t forget to take advantage of your family and friends either. You may not think this, but they want to spend time with your children, so if you are in desperate need of a date night or just a few hours to breath, make sure you pick up the phone and give them a call.
Make a List for Everything
Lists make everything a lot easier, and that includes creating ways to get out of your rut. Make a list of what you’d like to start incorporating into your life and a timeline for when you’d like to accomplish it. Also, create a secondary list - if you don’t have one already - of your daily chores to discover how you can slowly start to add in activities throughout the week. This will both allow you to create a routine that is active and healthy as well as allow you to see areas of opportunity to streamline some tasks that may otherwise take too much time of your day. For example, instead of trying to tackle home repairs yourself that just waste time and cause unnecessary stress, invest in a home protection plan. This will take a weight off of your shoulders and ensure that you have someone to call in case of an emergency.
Think About “Why”
A really useful exercise to practice when trying to refresh your life is to consider “why”. Why do you feel like you’re stuck? Why do you think certain practices will get you to get “unstuck”? Consider these questions to help you discover the best activities to incorporate into your life that will have the biggest impact.
Be Vigilant
There will be bumps along the road but that doesn’t mean it is time to give up. Make sure that you stick to your plan and your schedule and stay disciplined. You will fall into a rhythm soon enough.
Find an Accountability Partner
Try and find a fellow parent, outside of your partner, that you can use to hold yourself accountable. This doesn’t mean that it has to be exclusive to fitness either. You may want to focus on having an accountability partner that you check in with to make sure to spent some time alone each day, or you made a point to delegate at least one task to your family instead of doing it all yourself. Find someone that will make sure you do what you need to do to get “unstuck”.
Be Realistic
From your timeline to the number of activities you want to add in, to your diet, to even what type of actions you want to take to get “unstuck” - make sure that they are realistically able to be added into your lifestyle. Don’t create a laundry list of things you’d like to do that is so long it will never be attainable. Along with that, make sure you strategic in the items you’d like to add to your life. There’s no way you’ll be able to work out every day for two and a half hours then enjoy brunch with your friends, while your family is sitting around waiting for you at home. Consider your family and your current obligations what discovering how to get yourself out of a rut.
Celebrate the Wins
While you may be in for a long journey to get out of a rut, or to rediscover your life, that doesn’t mean you should forget the smaller wins throughout your journey. Make sure every accomplishment is recognized as what it is, an accomplishment.
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