Saturday, February 1, 2020

Parenting Pointers: Females in Fairytales

Fairy tales are a fundamental part of raising children: but what are we really teaching them when we tell the story of Sleeping Beauty?

Author Anne Beall, PhD an expert on fairy tales, data and the psychology of gender, analyzed 169 of the 200 Grimms’ fairy tales including Cinderella, Snow White and Sleeping Beauty. Using statistical methods to identify hidden patterns, she discovered that happily ever after is often elusive or questionable for women who marry a Prince or King-- just look at Meghan Markle!

Looking at the characters’ emotions, she also found that:
  • Princes and kings are happy. Almost half (41%) of kings’ expressions and over half (56%) of princes’ expressions are happy.
  • In contrast, queens express the emotion of sadness the most (41% are sad).
  • Although princesses express happiness when they find their prince, the next most often expressed emotions by this group are sadness (26%) and fear (22%).
  • Princesses in fairy tales are likely to be in terrible situations such as being captured and locked away or tormented by a stepmother such as in Snow White.
Given what fairy tales portend, Anne says, parents should take time to examine what fairy tales are really saying to their kids-- and make sure that they don’t set up their children -- especially their daughters -- to believe in finding their prince and “happily never after,” with false expectations of relationships and agency. Anne writes about this in her book Cinderella Didn’t Live Happily Ever After.

I had a chance to interview her to learn more.

Why can fairy tales be problematic?
Fairy tales have a variety of hidden messages that are communicated over and over again to young children. These messages involve who has agency, who has power, and who is good or evil. These tales also partially explain why people marry up. My firm analyzed 169 of the 200 Grimms’ fairy tales, which are the precursors to all major fairy tales today. This collection includes the most beloved ones such as Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty and Rapunzel. We used statistical methods to identify hidden patterns and determine what fairy tales are really saying, to analyze characters’ emotions and discern who has power, who suffers and who marries up and why. In our analysis of fairy tales, we learned that men are largely, powerful characters with agency,and that men and women marry up for different reasons. We found that there is an active male character in 81% of the stories, but only an active female character in 28% of them. Additionally, In fairy tales, men of lower status marry princesses due to feats, bravery or intelligence and women of lower status marry princes and kings largely because of their beauty. We also learned that powerful men in fairy tales are largely good (e.g., kings and princes) and powerful women are generally evil (e.g., stepmothers and witches). These messages tell girls that power and agency are the domain of men, that good women are generally powerless, and that beautiful women marry men who save them and provide them with a kingdom and title. These messages are not realistic or useful.

If kids are interested in fairy tale stories, how can parents balance imagination with reality?
One of the ways that parents can manage the messaging of fairy tales is by questioning them and suggesting that reality is—or should be—different. Kristen Bell has talked about this issue in the press, and she’s used fairy tales as a way to talk about significant #MeToo issues. For example, after reading Snow White, she asked her daughters if it was OK for the Prince to kiss Snow White without her consent. The girls said that it wasn’t.

Are there examples of fairy tales with positive, strong female characters?
Within the traditional Grimm’s fairy tales there are some wonderful examples of strong female characters. For example, in The Glass Coffin, a woman rejects the advances of an evil suitor and eventually escapes after brandishing a pistol. In Fitcher’s Bird, a woman outwits a wizard who kidnaps her and alerts her relatives, who then set his house on fire. In The Twelve Huntsmen, a woman is jilted by a king so she and eleven other women (who look like her) join his hunting group and hunt alongside him until he recognizes her and makes good on his promise. And in several stories, the main female character shows great courage and strength. For example, in The Seven Ravens a young girl goes to great lengths to find her seven brothers who have been turned into ravens. She ends up undergoing all types of trials—heat, cold, hunger and exhaustion. But she ends up prevailing and figures out the way to set her brothers free from the evil spell. They become human and all return home.

What are some alternatives to traditional fairytales?
There is definitely a demand for books that have strong female role models. There are collections of folk tales with strong women. There are also feminist fairy tales out there that take traditional stories and retell them. There has also been a resurgence of female superheroes in popular movies (e.g., Wonder Woman and Captain Marvel)





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