Honoring Motherhood By Being an Awesome Aunt

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By Heidi Mastrogiovanni 

Lala Pettibone, the title character of my comedic novels, and I are very similar. We both never wanted to have children of our own (other than our respective rescued senior dogs, whom we dote on with devotion and fervor that can only be described as maternal). Lala and I both have infinite admiration for people who are able to do a good job of raising children, because we both know we wouldn’t have the patience and skill to be the loving and caring parent every child deserves. But we both can absolutely rock being a fabulous aunt, if we do say so ourselves.

I remember reading somewhere that every child should have an aunt who doesn’t have children and who has the time and energy and resources to spoil them and fuss over them. It’s a noble calling in my book, and one that I embrace with joy and enthusiasm. I absolutely adore my nieces and nephews, and I am proud of them beyond description. They are all delightful people, and I love spending time with them.

I had to wait until I got married to have any actual nieces and nephews, because I don’t have siblings, but I have also always had an expansive view of what it means to be an aunt. Three of my first cousins have children with whom I am very close, and I always introduce them as my nieces and nephew. One of my closest friends is like a brother to me, and there’s no question that his son is my nephew. I also really love being a fun person with my friends’ kids, the one who says and does silly things to make them laugh. I think young people and animals are so wonderfully straightforward and honest, so when one of them likes you, it’s really quite lovely, isn’t it?

My nieces and nephews crack me up. I’m the aunt who laughs when the kid does something funny but also inappropriate, and any parent will tell you (and will tell me, repeatedly) that sends a mixed message which the parents then have to clean up when I drop the kids back at their house and go to join my husband at Happy Hour somewhere.

An example of me deeming comedy far more important than acting like an adult happened with friends of ours who have three delightful young children. I’m just crazy about them. Their middle child is a five-year-old boy, and he’s a hoot. He’s always giggling and he’s full of energy. He was being particularly silly one time and said to me, “You smell like farts and I smell like flowers!” I started guffawing and his parents looked horrified and they began to chastise him for saying that I had filled the air with gaseous emissions. I couldn’t stop laughing and tried to apologize for being a bad influence by rewarding their son with laughter when he had said a rather rude thing, and then I just had to add, “Listen, you have to give it to him. He’s got a great appreciation for alliteration and he sure knows how to land a joke.”

I hope that Lala and I honor motherhood by being the best aunts we can be. Because, truly, we couldn’t do what good mothers do. I hope all you wonderful mothers out there have aunts for your kids who offer you the kind of support and encouragement and appreciation you deserve. If not, give me a call next time you’re in Los Angeles, and I’ll play Aunt-for-a-Day. I just can’t promise that I won’t guffaw when your kid makes a fart joke…

HEIDI MASTROGIOVANNI is a graduate of Wesleyan University and was chosen as one of ScreenwritingU’s 15 Most Recommended Screenwriters of 2013. The comedy web series she writes and produces, Verdene and Gleneda, was awarded the Hotspot on the Writers Guild of America’s Hotlist. Heidi is fluent in German and French, though she doesn’t understand why both these languages feel they need more than one definite article.

A dedicated animal welfare advocate, Heidi lives in Los Angeles with her musician husband and their rescued senior dogs. She loves to read, hike, travel, and do a classic spit-take whenever something is really funny.

Lala Pettibone: Standing Room Only, the sequel to Lala Pettibone’s Act Two (finalist for Foreword Reviews’ 2017 Indies Book of the Year Awards), continues to explore the themes present in all Heidi’s work… It’s never too late to begin again, and it must be cocktail hour somewhere.

For more information, visit Heidi online at http://heidimastrogiovanni.com /, on Twitter(@HMastrogiovanni) at https://twitter.com/HMastrogio vanni, or on Facebook athttps://www.facebook.com/Heidi MastrogiovanniWriter/.