SwampButt - Pumpkin Spiced Underwear

I recently saw this and it's kind of cute!

September 21, 2018 was the official first day of fall and the day the makers of SwampButt Underwear™ (www.swampbutt.com) introduced Pumpkin Spiced SwampButt Underwear for the fall of 2018. And there are more than just leaves falling as the price of these seasonal drawers fell too.To celebrate everyone’s third favorite season, Pumpkin Spiced SwampButt Underwear is priced at $9.50 each, half the regular price of $18.99. The offer is good through October 31, 2018 or whenever the people who run the company’s web site remember to make the change back to the full price. The company timed the introduction to occur when fall officially arrived. SwampButt Underwear refused to push the fall season forward like so many others do with their fall specials.August Is Not FallWith much hullaballoo the makers of certain coffee-based beverages introduced their pumpkin spiced latte’s on August 28, 2018. But the leadership at SwampButt Underwear refused to join or support seasonal time shifts like these. “The lawyers told us not to mention Starbucks, so we will not,” said spokesman Nick Heraldson. “As people who sweat a lot, we are very much attuned to the weather and August is not fall. You can tell from the thermometer and the calendar.”Too Much Change Too Fast For Early FallAmericans are asked to do a lot in terms of change and changing which was the reason the owners of SwampButt Underwear were adamant about not asking the public to think about Pumpkin Spiced SwampButt Underwear earlier than necessary. Fall already seemed like a particularly demanding time. Promoting things reserved for fall in summer might look unwholesome.  “We already have daylight savings time and the whole fall backwards clock issue to deal with, except Arizona,” Heraldson lectured. “Plus, we have to time shift our favorite TV shows and televised sporting events because of work, a school thing with the kids, church, or some other colossal waste of time. We said, ‘enough already’ and kept Pumpkin Spiced Underwear in fall, the way nature intended.”Behind The Looking GlassConcerns about the real agenda and the motives behind pushing the season up and how this could be potentially part of some mind control experiment was also considered. Was Starbucks Pumpkin Spiced latte just a front for ‘gaslighting’ the public into believing something was real when it was not? Could some force or power want the public to embrace early fall for some nefarious reason? Reasons that the public could only speculate about? Did an absence of any facts or evidence on which to base such a claim important, or was that what ‘they’ wanted you to think? “The lawyers also said not to talk about conspiracies and to keep our foil hats out of site,” Heraldson confessed.  “I can only guess at the reason.”About SwampButt UnderwearYes Virginia, SwampButt Underwear is a real company that makes performance underwear for men who sweat a lot south of the beltline. SwampButt Underwear™ is trademarked in the United States and other countries. We paid a lot for that trademark, so please do not use it without permission. If you do and we find out, the lawyers will also want to speak with you! CAPTION: Nothing says fall like brown, orange and brown or brownish colored everything with the words pumpkin spice.