Book Nook: Hilariously Infertile

My husband and I didn't conceive our first daughter as soon as I'd have liked, and we did struggle with that - not nearly to the extent that some people do, but enough that we can empathize with those who have lost babies through miscarriage or struggled to conceive in the first place.

Comedian and teacher Karen Jeffries wrote a book on her experiences with infertility called, Hilariously Infertile. The book is a mission to make others who have struggled with infertility laugh as they stare into the harsh, scary, and often sad world of infertility. 

Karen knew she had to write the book after being turned down by numerous agents and publishers, many of whom replied back that infertility is not a big enough market. The bottom line, just like miscarriages, people feel that it is still a taboo subject matter. That reinforced to Karen that so many people were at home, suffering in silence. So she started writing and took to social media.

Karen shares her experiences often with her followers on social media which has over 55k followers that religiously watch her daily live videos. I had a chance to interview her about having humor in the face of infertility.

Why did you decide to write this book?
I was helping my friend and another family member both through their infertility cycles when my husband suggested that I write a book. I laughed him off. A few weeks later, I just started writing and then it spilled out of me. Five weeks after that I had a finished version of Hilariously Infertile which is very close to the final copy that is out today. As I was writing, I realized it was funny, inappropriate, snarky, but funny, and relatable. That’s when I realized that people will want this, and this will help people get through their cycles.

How can humor be used as a coping mechanism?
I think humor is a great coping mechanism. My husband and I were always laughing at the ridiculousness of the whole infertility process. We cried too. Well, I cried, he held me. However, we laughed a lot because there are days that if you don’t laugh, all you will do is cry.

What would you say to people who might think it's inappropriate to be humorous when discussing infertility?
Infertility is not a joke. It is a serious disease that is affecting millions of people all over the world. But there are some aspects of infertility that are funny. The ultrasound wand probing you, the male giving his “donation” to the clinic. We can laugh at those aspects and still respect that infertility is a serious topic.

How can people help reduce the stigma around things like infertility or miscarriage?
Talk about it. After I was open about my infertility, family members told me about their miscarriages and I felt so awful. Why didn’t I know? I would have supported them. Some people still remain quiet about their infertility or miscarriages, but the more we talk about it, the more we connect with other people who have been in the same situation and the more we realize that we are not alone.