Money Matters: Combining Finances with a Partner

 If there’s one thing people need to know before they get married it is how to handle their finances. I had a chance to interview financial advisor Chaim Geller. Chaim is an expert in all things finance from building credit and buying homes to making smart everyday purchases. Chaim would love to share his advice with newlyweds on how to best navigate challenging financial milestones, from managing old debts to merging finances, and advice on how to best support a partner with different spending habits, buying a home or expanding your family.

Why is it important for couples to talk about finances?

Like with everything in a marriage, it is very important for a couple to be on the same page. You and your spouse should understand what your budget is, what lifestyle you can afford, and evaluate whether you are earning enough to cover your lifestyle. These are questions that need to be discussed to make sure both parties are on the same financial page.

When is a good time in the relationship to talk?

Finances is one of the most important factors in a marriage. Not talking about it can cause a lot of trouble, but before you bring it up you must feel ready to talk about it. Talk as soon as you feel that both of you are ready. It should be sooner rather than later because not being on the same page can cause a lot of friction in your marriage. When that's the case, every grocery trip can become a major argument. The sooner you can talk about finances and clear the air, the better.

How can couples navigate previous financial topics like debt?

First of all, it is crucial to understand that there are two types of debt; healthy debt and unhealthy debt. 

Healthy debt is from student loans, mortgages, etc. With healthy debt, since it's ongoing payments, it's just important that your spouse is aware of the debt and so that they can expect it and include it into your monthly budget. Healthy debt doesn't come as a surprise so you can plan it well, include it in your budget, and navigate it smoothly. 

Unhealthy debt comes from an excessive spending habit which can lead to huge debt. If this is the case in a marriage, the couple should still try to see eye to eye. Again, discuss what type of lifestyle you can and can't afford and be be open about it. If at this point, you feel your spouse would benefit from professional help to solve a spending problem, go for it. Seek professional help and tackle it together. 

What's your advice to couples where each partner might have a different spending habit?

Unfortunately, letting it ride will only cause issues in your relationship. Every grocery trip will become a fight. 

When your spending habits don't seem to align, sit together and talk about your budget. The best is if you can set a budget that both spouses understand and can stick to. Know that there is nothing wrong with putting luxury items into your budget, if you can afford it. So that's good if one spouse tends to enjoy spending more. If one spouse would want to buy a luxury item such as a fur coat, instead of heading out right then and dishing out the cash, you can put aside some money every month until you save up enough for the luxury item price tag. 

Also, always remember that if you feel you need professional help for budgeting, that's normal. Do it as a team and seek professional help. A good book can sometimes do the trick, and sometimes you need a professional to help you out.