Baffled by the moms who seemingly had plenty of time to exercise, serve up home-cooked meals, volunteer, work and straighten their hair, mother of two under two Nikki Oden wanted answers.
“I had no idea what I was doing, and most days, didn’t brush my teeth. I completely lost myself in being ‘Mommy’ and ‘Wife,’” Oden writes in the introduction to her new book, But Definitely Wear Mascara: Hacks to Help You Love Your Mom Life (and Yourself) a Little More.
Oden walked away from a lucrative career as a lawyer to be a stay-at-home mom before eventually returning to the legal field part time to strike the balance she needed.
“Being a mom is hard. And being a mom with goals and dreams is even harder,” she notes. “All moms struggle with harmonizing what they have to do with what they want to do, and it’s OK to fall down along the way.”
Because no mom has time for a tome, But Definitely Wear Mascara contains short chapters that tackle specific topics, such as The Power of a Morning Routine, Make Yourself a To-Don’t List, Getting Stuff Done When Your Kids Are Home and Perfect, Schmerfect. Readers can dive in where they need to or enjoy Oden’s humorous, conversational style from start to finish.
“How often do you say to yourself, I love my mom life? A lot, hopefully! If, on the other hand, you sometimes feel like motherhood is one long ride on the Hot Mess Express, you’re not alone,” Oden adds.
I had a chance to interview her to learn more.
Why did you write this book? I wrote this book as a tribute to all the working moms out there who are trying to make an impact on the world while still being the best moms they can be. Being a mom is hard. And being a mom with goals and dreams is even harder. Nurturing your career while nurturing your family is not easy, and there are a ton of opportunities to find yourself on the Hot Mess Express along the way. My book normalizes motherhood face-plants and helps mothers realize they're not alone, while also giving them real-life advice (tested by me!) they can implement to make mom life easier.
I personally don't wear mascara, but I'm assuming I'd still find something interesting about this book. Can you share a little bit about how you came up with the title? The title, But Definitely Wear Mascara, is a metaphor. It means, "I know things might be hectic and your kids might be making you a little bit nuts, but still do something, no matter how small, to take care of yourself." No actual mascara is required, though!
Why do you want to focus on loving life? I believe God gave us gifts and told us to shine. When you're a mom, it's often easy to forget that truth in the midst of the many tasks we mothers have to perform every day, not the least of which include keeping our children alive. But we only have one life. We're doing our children—and the world—a disservice by not living and loving it fully.
How can small changes have a big impact? The only way to make a big impact is through small changes. Small changes are easy to implement, which means you'll actually perform them, but when done with consistently, they compound. And when you're a mom who is already busy with raising children and a career, it's especially important to remember that to crush a huge goal, you must begin with tiny steps.
The book can be purchased on Barnes & Noble here or on Amazon here
About the Author
Nikki Oden is a happy wife, mom of two, lawyer, and mom coach who helps working moms battle burnout by teaching them how to own their days and crush their goals —without the mom guilt. She is the founder of Your Ideal Mom Life, host of the Love Your Mom Life podcast and author of But Definitely Wear Mascara: Hacks to Help you Love Your Mom Life (and Yourself) a Little More. Her work has been featured in The Boston Globe, TODAY Parents, CafeMom, KidSpot, Clean Plates and Authority Magazine.
For more information, please visit www.youridealmomlife.com; follow the author on Facebook (Your Ideal Mom Life) and Instagram (nikkioden); or listen to her podcasts at https://podcasts.apple.com/us/
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