Parenting Pointers - The Juggle is Real: Balancing Parenthood, Work, and Creativity

Guest post by Pamela Harris, author of This Town is on Fire.

If you’re a parent or caregiver who works full-time, your dreams of writing (or doing anything creative, for that matter) may remain just that. A dream. There’s already so much to balance: packing lunches, helping with homework, hitting deadlines at work. And meetings. So. Many. Meetings. With all this going on, finding time to write might seem like a luxury. I understand this struggle all too well. I wrote my first two published novels during tiny slivers of time—and I had to be intentional about making that time for myself. The good news is that it didn’t take me abandoning my kids and job and secluding myself in a cabin for months (though, in all honesty, I wouldn’t mind at least a week away). Here are some tips I’ve collected along the way to help manage the juggle while also keeping my writing dreams near the forefront.

1. Rethink Your Definition of Writing. If you’re anything like me, you’ve probably read stories of writers hitting certain word counts each day, whether it’s 500 words or full-blown chapters. I started to realize that the thoughts I jotted down in my Notes app during a lunch break were just as important as the words that I typed on my laptop. Those notes still contributed to my story, no matter how incoherent they initially are.
2. Start Small. There have been times during one of my writing sessions where I just stared at the cursor blinking at me. Or maybe I didn’t like a specific word choice, so I hopped on the internet for a synonym and soon I’m down a rabbit hole of finding out when the first Black sorority was established (yes, I’ve looked this up before. No, this piece of information did not make it into my story). To avoid procrastination, I participate in word sprints—sometimes with a group of other writers (whether in-person or virtually), but often I’ll take a solo run. A word sprint is simply timing yourself (my go to is usually ten or fifteen minutes) to get as many words on the page as possible. No distractions. No inner editor. Just writing. Once the timer goes off, I take a break. You’d be surprised of how many bits from these sprints made it into my finished novels.
3. Reach Out to Your Village. I’m a single mother, but I have family that supports me and my writing dreams. When I’m on a deadline, my children’s godmother has been known to send me off to my office while she kept the kids fed and entertained. Even if you have a partner that agrees to handle bedtime solo once or twice a week, every bit of time counts.
4. Let the Kids See You Create. Nothing made me prouder than when my four-year-old daughter noticed mama’s name on a book cover. I realized then that it was important for her to see how those books actually get made. Every now and then, I’ll spend a few moments on the couch writing while my kids play or watch Bluey. I want them to see my passion in action, and hope that they learn that creativity is worth making time for.
5. Protect Your Time. Even if you only have thirty minutes, find one slot each week that is dedicated to your writing. For me, it’s Saturday mornings after the breakfast shuffle. From roughly ten a.m. to noon, I lock myself up in my office and write while drinking my coffee. It gives me a moment of peace to create and leaves the rest of the day for me to spend time with my kids.

Parenthood and creativity do not have to be at war with each other. Though the relationship might look a little messy, they can definitely coexist. Your writing dreams can become a reality, even if they come to fruition between doctor appointments, potty training, and work presentations. Take your wins—no matter how small or infrequent they may be. Every word adds up to the story you were meant to tell. And when that story is finished, your kids will be your biggest cheerleaders.