Leslie Forde, founder of Mom's Hierarchy of Needs, wrote the book Repair with Self-Care which releases on September 3.
Pulling on over 3,700 participants in her caregiver study, Leslie offers an inclusive approach with tactical strategies for how moms can navigate the challenges of our current system while continuing to advocate for policy change.
With an approachable tone and data-backed approach, Leslie also offers a robust toolkit of resources.
I had a chance to interview her to learn more.
Can you share a little bit about Mom's Hierarchy of Needs and why it's important for moms to learn to fulfill their own needs?
*** When I burned out after returning to work from my second maternity leave, I thought every other mom must have seen a memo I missed. I couldn't understand why it was so hard to make time for self-care and professional growth after having kids. The idea for the Mom's Hierarchy of Needs, was a realization that the activities mothers prioritize at the base, like our children's wellbeing and milestones, followed by our household and professional roles are never really done. They're all important yet perpetual responsibilities without finish lines.
That awareness freed me to think about time for my health differently. Including how to reclaim space at the top of the Mom's Hierarchy of Needs for critical self-care activities like sleep, movement, stress management, learning and healthy adult relationships. Later, when I conducted research for a mental health startup, I learned that those self-care activities are not only desirable but critical to reduce the stress hormone cortisol in our bodies that can lead to so many chronic illnesses that disproportionately impact mothers. I became obsessed with understanding what would allow mothers to reclaim more time for our health, growth and wellbeing.
That awareness freed me to think about time for my health differently. Including how to reclaim space at the top of the Mom's Hierarchy of Needs for critical self-care activities like sleep, movement, stress management, learning and healthy adult relationships. Later, when I conducted research for a mental health startup, I learned that those self-care activities are not only desirable but critical to reduce the stress hormone cortisol in our bodies that can lead to so many chronic illnesses that disproportionately impact mothers. I became obsessed with understanding what would allow mothers to reclaim more time for our health, growth and wellbeing.
Why did you write this book?
*** I've been writing and researching about the challenge of self-care for mothers for over 8 years now, in addition to over 15 years working in industries that support parents and families. Yet whether I wrote an article or taught a workshop for an employer, I was only able to share brief bursts of understanding with others. Writing the book is different, it's comprehensive and intended to provide deep, self-paced learning about how to transform mothers' lives in positive ways. It felt important to share the information in a comprehensive, "step by step" way.
Why is it important that this book contains practical strategies for moms?
*** Moms have very little discretionary time, and when we do have it, we often feel too guilty to use it in service to ourselves. The book had to be an unapologetic guide to self-care balanced with deep understanding and compassion for what most mothers' lives are really like day to day. The information had to be accessible and actionable for the demanding schedules, and social norms that most US moms are operating within. I was open that I not only research this, I too live these challenges daily.
How can moms learn to advocate for what they need, in the workplace and at home?
*** The reality is, self-advocacy in the home is important yet it's often time consuming if it involves a partner or children. And we can't always self-advocate, especially when it comes to the workplace. Understanding when self-advocacy is less likely to succeed is part of the opportunity for moms. Unfortunately, our boundaries aren't always accepted or respected so "self advocacy" might be in concert with a group, at work or in your community to advance systems changes. Understanding where you might need help or have triggers that make it more difficult to protect your best interests, in personal or professional life is also critical. In the book, I share several stories, research results and strategies to increase confidence and efficacy with self-advocacy.
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