Parenting Pointers: Writing a "Love Letter" to Cope During the Adoption Process

With Valentine's Day just around the corner, there are many expecting parents who are waiting for their adoption to go through, it can seem like it is never going to happen. Having to wait even one more minute before they see their perfect baby is difficult. One of the best ways to channel the excitement and anticipation during this period is to write a love letter to your child.

Writing a letter to one's future baby or the birth mother of one's future baby is a wonderful way to express these emotions in a constructive way. Being able to express the love a parent has for a child they are anxiously waiting for is such a positive and healing exercise. For those who have already adopted, it may be difficult to pin down all the different emotions that swirl through them. And they may not have the opportunity to express their feelings to the birth mother of their baby.  Executive Director of The Adoption Consultancy Nicole Witt offers these tips to write a "Love Letter" this year that is a healthy and safe way to sort through all of the emotions above:

1) List All The Moments YOU Are Excited For Or Experienced: Make a list of all the things they are excited to experience with their future baby or the most special moments they've already experienced.

2) Thoughts When Meeting The Mother/Baby: Write down what they most remember about or are most looking forward to the moment they meet the birth mother and baby.

3) Express Your Dreams: Explain the dreams they have for the baby's life and for the baby's birth mother's future.

4) What You Wished You Knew About The Mother's Background: Think about things they wished they knew/would know about the baby's/birth mother's background.

5) The Future: Think about the positive, long-term ways their future will change because of this adoption.

6) Put "Love" In That Letter:  Why you already love your adoptive son or daughter so much; or if you adopted how much love came into your life the day the adoption process closed and your child arrived.  This love letter can be cherished for years to come.